420 reasons Shoppers Drug Mart should totally sell pot

Just kidding. Here are seven.

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Marijuana

Canada’s largest purveyor of Optimum points is mulling over a move into the medical-marijuana market. According to the Globe and Mail, in the past few months Shoppers Drug Mart execs have taken meetings with licensed medical-marijuana producers across the country to inquire about selling their weed wares in-store. It’s a logical venture: Pharmacies are already responsible for dispensing all other prescriptions, and it’s a way to secure a potentially massive revenue stream should the government eventually legalize the drug for recreational use. But dollars and cents aside, Shoppers is an ideal pusher for other, less health-centric reasons. Like these:

1. The chip selection, for starters.

potato chips

2. You can do your groceries, read a magazine, shop discounted holiday chocolate and finally buy stamps while you wait for your prescription to be filled.

3. Life Brand pot will probably be way cheaper than whatever Back Alley Chad has in stock.

weeds

4. The preponderance of room sprays and — for more discerning customers — high-end perfumes, perfect for masking any unsavoury aromas.

Photo, Roberto Caruso.

Photo, Roberto Caruso.

5. Throwing your supply on the checkout counter might distract from other awkward purchases. If people don’t know which purchase to judge you for, maybe they just … won’t?

condoms

6. The hilarious possibility of watching frugal shoppers attempt to apply coupons to former street drugs.

Getty Images

Getty Images

7. Triple the Optimum Points on 420. Think about it.

optimum
Obviously pot won’t be slotted on the shelves next to the Pepto and Ensure anytime soon, but one can dream. In vivid, swirling colour.

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