Sex in the water

My husband and I would like to try sex in a pool or the ocean but I've heard it's not safe to make love in the water. What are our options?

Making love in the water is a great way to add spice to your sex life. While you may be worried that water will be forced into your vagina, you needn’t be; sex in the water is generally safe. Your vagina is not an empty vessel—it was designed to be penetrated—so water won’t flow into it if you’re making love in the tub any more than it would if you were bathing. And once your husband’s penis is inside you, there isn’t much room for anything else. That said, if you have an orgasm in the water, the vaginal contractions that accompany it could create a suction effect and draw some water up inside of you. If that water is treated with chemicals, it could irritate your vagina.

The key to fantastic sex in the water is making sure you’ve got enough lubrication. Penetration may be a little more difficult than usual because water washes away some of your natural lubrication. To make it more comfortable, insert a small amount of water-based lubricant into your vagina beforehand. Whether you plan to try sex in the ocean, a hot tub or your shower at home, here’s what you need to know to make it as pleasurable and seductive as possible:

Sex at the beach

What’s great about sex in the ocean—besides the heat and moisture—is the feeling of weightlessness, which makes all of those awkward standing sex positions possible. Try them when the coast is clear and you’ve waded in to about chest height. You’ll probably find it easiest if you’re holding on to each other, with your legs wrapped around your husband’s waist. If you’re not on a secluded beach, simply slip the crotch of your swimsuit aside. Keep in mind that if the water is cold, your husband’s penis may shrink and he may experience a slower sexual response. You’ll probably both enjoy sex more if the water is warm.

Sex in the pool

While on holiday, many couples like heating things up in a hot tub or pool before heading to their hotel room for some privacy. If you’re planning a midnight rendezvous in the hotel pool, inspect your surroundings during daylight to make sure that there are no security cameras—there’s no need to share your amorous event with the security guards. If you have your own backyard pool, try having sex against the side wall. Or if there’s a ledge inside the pool or hot tub, your husband can sit on that while you lower yourself onto him, either facing toward him or facing away. Be warned that some chemicals, such as chlorine, in public pools or hot tubs may irritate your genitals.

Sex in the shower

You don’t have to go far to find a venue for making love in the water. Your own shower or bathtub could be your private sex oasis. Before you start experimenting with different sex positions, make sure you outfit the tub with a rubber mat so you won’t slip and fall. If your tub is big enough to accommodate two people, try making love with you on top. While showering, I’d recommend the rear-entry position, with you leaning forward and the water splashing over both of you.

Lou Paget is a sex educator and the best-selling author of The Big O (Broadway).

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