Sex & Relationships

Vacation sex!

The mile-high club, getting busy on the beach and six more ways to keep things hot during summer break

Chatelaine

When you’re planning a vacation with a loved one chances are you’re looking forward to sun and sand and what’s seldom mentioned but highly anticipated – the sex. Vacation sex can be some of the most memorable. We asked sexperts for tips on making it even more unforgettable:

One week before your trip…
Hold off on sex for a few days before your vacation to build anticipation. Then up the intrigue by giving your partner sexy details of what’s in store either by email or text. Dr. David McKenzie, a Vancouver-based sex and couples therapist recommends couples go out and buy sexy new outfits then meet each other in a venue they’ve never been before, such as a bar or a club. “Some of my clients have told me they had the most exciting sex since they’ve met after that. Seeing your partner in a different context is exciting,” he says.

If you’re staying with friends…
This can be tricky says McKenzie. If you’re staying in cramped quarters though, there’s a certain thrill from getting heated and trying to keep it hush. McKenzie says, “Being risqué is part of the excitement.” He suggests holding your hands over each others mouths as a way to stay quiet and turn each other on. If you still feel uncomfortable, wait until everyone is out of the house to spend quality time together. Or opt to stay at a local hotel for one night.

If you want to join the mile-high club…
Considering an exclusive membership to the club? Think twice say the experts. It’s pretty complicated to get down on a cramped commercial flight says McKenzie. Nadya Johnston Phelan, a travel agent with Flight Centre in Toronto says, “It’s not really looked upon fondly, so make it as fast as you can. Night flights are legendary for all sorts of shenanigans. Just remember that staff is never pleased to be dealing with it.”

If you want to have sex on the beach…
Done wrong, this experience can be less than romantic. Who wants sand and grit in places there shouldn’t be? The ideal way to pull this off is to choose a secluded spot around dusk when most people are at dinner. Remember to pack towels and blankets to help you be discreet. Avoid the designated family beaches and hordes of children and look for adults-only beaches. Johnston Phelan says the key is to be mindful of where you are, giving the example of one couple from the UK who were arrested for having sex on the beach in Dubai, a conservative city.

If the kids are tagging along…
With young children, cruises are a great option because you can drop them off at baby-sitting programs while you and your partner sneak off. Travelling with other couples and their kids is also convenient since it means you can take turns baby-sitting and alternate date nights. If you have young kids staying in the same room as you, take the action to the bathroom, hotel balcony or the floor to keep things exciting. If your kids are older, better resorts have activities like DJ lessons. Negotiate a time when they can go and participate in these programs, know when they’re getting back and hang the ‘do not disturb’ sign.

If you’re leaving the kids behind…
Choose an adults-only resort. “You’re going to miss your kids. The last thing you want to do is be reminded of children all day,” says Johnston Phelan. Adults-only means you can focus on each other and relaxing, and the unforgettable sex will follow.

If you need another reason to book a trip…
“The break of being on vacation is psychologically refreshing,” says McKenzie. There are also studies that show sunshine increases libido since the rays up serotonin levels, especially in women. But don’t expect a vacation to patch up cracks in your relationship, warns Dr. David Hersh, a Calgary-based sex therapist: “If sex is not working with a couple at home, simply getting away is not a guaranteed way to improve it.” While the holiday from reality can do wonders for a week, you’ll have to deal with any deep-seeded issues as soon as the plane lands.

If you need a night away…
Sneak off for a night to a hotel in your city and the sex can feel as carefree as if you’re hundreds of miles away. Call ahead and inform staff it’s your anniversary (even if it’s not) and they may offer you a special couples’ massage package at a discount. If you ask nicely, you might be able to check out late the next day, too. Even if all you get is a “Happy Anniversary” upon check-in, you and your guy will feel like it’s your little secret and are guaranteed to have a good time.