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Social quandary: My bridal shower host is a belligerent drinker

Her aunt is throwing her a bridal shower, and she's worried there will be yet another embarrassing scene.

Lemon-thyme wine spritzer

Photo by Ryan Szulc

Have you found yourself in an awkward situation? Has someone irked you and you’re not sure how best to proceed? If so, you’re not alone! Every week, we feature a reader-submitted quandary so that you can weigh in with your best advice. What would you do in their situation? If you’d like to submit your own quandary, click here.

My aunt is planning to host my bridal shower. I really appreciate her taking this on, but I’m worried – she’s a bad drunk and I know she’ll embarrass me. When she’s sober, she’s the most wonderful person but when she’s had a lot to drink, she becomes completely different. And unfortunately, there’s no off switch because once she starts, she keeps on drinking, then the other personality comes out. She starts swearing, spilling drinks, and being rude. I’ve witnessed her yell at waitstaff, cab drivers and random strangers. I’m worried that she’ll say something rude to one of my friends or make a spectacle of herself. I have work colleagues coming to the shower too, and I’ll be mortified if she behaves that way in front of them. I don’t want to have an alcohol-free party – that’s not the bridal shower I envisioned – but that might be the only solution. I don’t have a close enough relationship with her to tell her she’s a bad drunk, plus she’s throwing me the party – it would be rude of me to ask her not to drink. Has anyone else experienced this? What should I do?

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