Sex & Relationships

He says, she says...on romance

Does the romance end when you get hitched? Married couple Dave and Lisa dish on date nights, Valentine's Day and what constitutes a romantic gift.

Lisa: We haven’t gone on a date in a long time. I’m not sure how a “date night” is different from, say, last week when we went to McDonald’s and then spent an hour at Chapters, but I’d like to have more of them.

Dave: I think of Fridays as “date night.” My idea of romantic is ordering in a curry, finding a good flick on the movie channel and sharing a bag of wine gums. Going out is great, but – and I hope you don’t misunderstand me – we don’t exactly have a lot to talk about. It kinda feels awkward, like we’re supposed to be “reconnecting” instead of venting about work.

Lisa: That makes sense. I just like getting dressed up once in a while, having a nice meal. But I guess we do that at least twice a year, for our anniversary and Valentine’s.

Dave: Do you even like Valentine’s Day?

Lisa: Not really. Don’t get me wrong, I love the special attention and the presents and all the gushy stuff. But it’s a lot of pressure for me, because you’re so good at it. You’re like, “Here’s a present that I themed on what the weather was like the first day we met.” And I’m all, “I got you these boxer shorts with hearts on them. They were on sale.”

Dave: Funny. That’s the only thing I don’t like about Valentine’s Day: that the onus always seems to be on the fella (me) to come up with some elaborate plan, preferably something that tops whatever I did last year.

Lisa: It’s the same thing with birthdays and Christmas. What will you do when it’s our 50th Valentine’s Day together? Get me a vintage sportscar? (Hint, hint.) Maybe we should make some rules, set a spending limit.

Dave: What would you say is the most romantic thing I’ve ever done? I want to know if we’re in agreement on this one.

Lisa: That’s a hard one…I don’t think I can choose. Like I said, you’re good at it. Did you take some special “Melt Your Lady’s Heart in Three Simple Steps” course? A friend reminded me of something the other day (so you’re even wooing other ladies without knowing it): one week I was working really late hours, and I came home at 1 a.m. to find a bunch of lip balm and hand cream on my pillow, and a card with a bearded guy on it that said, “Amish you.” This is why I can’t compete.

Dave: I forgot about that, too. That’s pretty sweet of me.

Lisa: And what would you say about my romance attempts?

Dave: They’re sweet. And far more practical. You always seem to remember when I mention that I need to pick up the third book in a trilogy – or notice how upset I was when the dog ate my iPod – and surprised me by running the errand for me. Giving me more time to sit on the couch and play Nintendo Wii? That’s what I call romantic.

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