Random thoughts

Sometimes when I let my mind wander to where it shouldn't go, random thoughts come to me...

Tonight as I was putting on my night moisturizer (read anti-wrinkle cream), I started thinking to myself – do I have to? Is it worth it? Why bother spending the time and money? Will I have to worry about wrinkles?…..I hope so. I am writing this instead of posting a video because I found it hard to talk about this but wanted to let you know that these thoughts do invade my mind. When I am not busy and I let my mind wander, these thoughts can’t help but poke their way through the armour that I have built up around me.

I have been speaking with lots of people lately about ovarian cancer. There are a couple of charitable projects that I am involved with right now that are taking up my time and that are leading me to different groups. I am speaking with people affected by the disease both directly and indirectly. I love to hear from survivors. I love to hear from those who have beat this disease and come out stronger. But, the reality is that I have also been hearing about lots and lots of people who didn’t survive. I hear about lots of people who lost their battle. Then I start to think about the numbers. Given that I have now survived 5 years, I only have a 10% chance of surviving another 5 years. Those ain’t great odds! But, I have always said that the only statistic that matters is mine because that one is 100% – live or die.

Which brings us back to where I started – is it worth it? Should I worry about wrinkles?…..I hope so