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Whenever I see movies, plays, etc. where a mother has died, it makes me very emotional. I watch children going through rites of passage and I can't help but wonder whether I will be there to help Sydney through her rites. I am trying to leave a legacy in writing so she knows who I am and what my view of the world is, but it saddens me to know that this may be the only way she will get to know those elements of who I am. It saddens me to know that I may not be there for her when she needs her mother
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