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Why every self-respecting, summer-loving woman needs a caftan

Hint: The reason is not love handles.
Photo, New York Public Library. Photo, New York Public Library.

Marooned on a dock somewhere outside Haliburton last weekend, I was feeling incredibly self-congratulatory: Critically acclaimed yet accessible beach read? Check. Supportive yet revealing bikini top? Check. Lone orange gummy bear adrift in my sangria? Check to that, too. It was at that exact moment that I clocked my friend (the cottage-owner) sashaying down the hill in a caftan — a glorious, undulating Ikat mix of cerulean and tangerine. In an instant, I went from self-proclaimed Queen of Rustic Leisure to a vacationing amateur languishing on a kids' towel.

We often judge a caftan on its ability to conceal months and months of hard-earned abdominal flab, or spots we "miss" while shaving. But there's another, less punishing reason to drape yourself in billowing folds: Summer holidays provide a rare opportunity to imbue our wardrobes with some camp, a little costume-y pizzazz. It's a chance to parade around like the bloody Queen of the Nile with impunity. No one screws with a confident woman enveloped in luxurious fabrics.

And while caftans are a statement unto themselves, they are bettered by equally loud accessories: giant, bug-eyed sunnies; a fish-bowl-sized goblet of rosé; a yacht, if you can find one. Peruse the gallery below to find one that suits your tastes, whether that skews more "adventurous tunic" or "Elizabeth Taylor."

Caftans

Kaftan dress, $159, Scotch & Soda.

Why every self-respecting, summer-loving woman needs a caftan

Melrose muse kaftan, $168, Free People.

Why every self-respecting, summer-loving woman needs a caftan

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Print kaftan, $39, Joe Fresh.

Why every self-respecting, summer-loving woman needs a caftan

Red mini caftan dress, $65, Express.

Why every self-respecting, summer-loving woman needs a caftan

River Island printed caftan, $73, Asos.

Why every self-respecting, summer-loving woman needs a caftan

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O'Neill Camara print caftan, $109, Nordstrom.

Why every self-respecting, summer-loving woman needs a caftan

Jessica Simpson tunic, $86, Bikini Village.

Why every self-respecting, summer-loving woman needs a caftan

OceanAndMain long caftan, $220, Etsy.

Why every self-respecting, summer-loving woman needs a caftan

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Striped gauze tassel swim cover-up, $35, Old Navy.

Why every self-respecting, summer-loving woman needs a caftan

Vix Kate voile kaftan, $252, Net-a-Porter.

Le Sirenuse for J.Crew caftan, $255, J.Crew.

Why every self-respecting, summer-loving woman needs a caftan

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